A Muse to Amuse, A Thought to Think Upon

I have been seeing quotes like the following on different friends Facebook pages & felt the need to share why they resonated with me. "Once the glue of the family passes away,  holidays are not the same,"  My Grandma B was DEFINITELY, HANDS DOWN, IMPOSSIBLE TO ARGUE WITH, THE GLUE of our family.  She checked in with each of her 6 & their families at least once a week. She'd call our house and often get me. I'd crack up laughing cause instead of saying, "hello," she'd say, "well?" I'd answer, "well, you called,".. "well, where's your mom? Is your dad ok? What are your brothers up to? Are you doing ok in school?" She'd want the run down & then she was good. Grandma sent us all birthday cards and would often sneak in some stamps or $2-$3 in them. It was what she had. All she had she gave. She was selfless and giving, the most generous person I've ever known.  I don't really know when the Drs disc...

My Grandpa & Grandma Barnett were very devout Christian people. They attended the little community church at Conconully. Grandma played organ & Grandpa had a booming base voice that led the church in song sometimes. Grandma was an alto & had an ear for singing harmony. I loved that they were musical and they passed that on to their children. My dad was gifted with a beautiful high tenor voice. His brothers & sister all could sing too, so there was a lot of singing during family gatherings. To me, it sounded as good as any recording available. I felt lucky that my family loved music. I felt happiest when they'd sing old hymns and proud when I could carry the melody on because I usually knew the most verses. Music was a big part of my Grandparents life but more importantly God was in every part of their lives. I can't remember a morning that I'd not see Grandpa praying in the living room for his family. He was usually silent but at times I could hear him calli...

 Now, please realize that part of why I'm blogging is for my own sanity- to be able to remember &recollect, find right wording, tell my story & share my story. And with great hope that something I say might resonate with someone who's reading & speak to them in some way.  I don't remember much before age 5 & I guess that's probably "normal recall." The Barnett's were (are still) a large family. My dad is one of six children.  Those six had 12 kids-the cousins- we were a dozen strong, with 7 older than me & 4 younger. Life seems so much simpler when I think back to those times. I think it's partly that I was a kid & sheltered from the weight of the world. But I think the other part was that the world & our nation wasn't being bombarded with all the madness that we are these days! We were more of "One Nation Under God," we are not ONE in our current state & we're not concerning ourselves with God... When ...

So I shared some bullying stories to establish the fact that I was always told I was fat, STUPID and ugly, so I always BELIEVED I WAS. I really struggled to get decent grades, except for in Chorus & English. I almost failed the Math classes & had to fight for the D I had. I think my GPA was a 2.3 or so, barely passing.  In one of the first childcare trainings I attended, they presented Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs I sat and cried as everyone wondered what was going on. For the first time I realized I wasn't stupid I just didn't have the basic needs of feeling safe & belonging. I was in a warzone and all consumed making strategies of how I could get myself down the hill home @ days end or which hallway I could use to avoid certain people. I didn't feel safe. I wasn't safe. I was lacking other things too, and education- actually learning was clear at the top of the triangle... Maslow's theory helped me in a profound way to realize maybe I was smart enou...

 I was born as a small baby, but that quickly changed. I can't say exactly when I started being chubbier than my peers? I've been told that I was very young (1 or 2) and could be heard saying, "No toast, no cereal." Dieting started early. I quickly learned that I was different and different wasn't good. I have a very vague memory from when I was 4. A group of kids sitting on a couch.  They wouldn't let me sit with them because I was too big & they were calling me names. I don't remember much from Kindergarten and 1st grade. 2nd grade, we moved to Tonasket and I got hammered there.  My best friend was a troublemaker bad boy. He was very protective of me & even jumped out of the detention window one time to help me fight these older kids that kept bothering me at recess. He was my hero. I was a scrapper.  4th grade, now, we lived in Kent 1/2 a year. I know I got picked on but nobody sticks out. My second half of 4th grade we moved to Auburn. The kids...

 Granted, the majority of my professional and personal "work" has been with children. I may be kinda partial. What I love about children- in general- is their endless curiosity, endless sense of wonder & endless energy. Oh to be able to bottle that up & take a drink or two!  Uninhibited children will dare to imagine and come up with the darndest things. They will blow you out of the water as the thoughts they are thinking turn into words. You will wonder where they heard a certain phrase or word and how their minds are like little sponges that grab up all they hear & see. The word for an 🍊 in Spanish is naranja and the word for 🕷️ in Spanish is aranja .. in my preschool class, our color for the day was orange. Naturally, at meal times we had oranges, carrots, orange colored peppers. I told the kids how much I loved oranges, how they were so good for you and had so many vitamins. I'd talk about oranges throughout the day. Little did I know that I was actually...

 I wrote my history of work with children and families (working with the littles) so you'd know where I'm coming from & why... I've been encouraged to share some thoughts on good parenting and appropriate child development. My mom says I make things simple. I feel like these are simple things yet sometimes so hard to do... I'll probably share more & please request a topic if I fail to address it.  This is for parents, grandparents, teachers, babysitter's, nannies, etc. *It is okay to say "NO" to a child. They need to learn the word and what it means. They need to know that there are consequences when they say yes to a no. Obviously we NEED the word. No, don't touch that stove, you will get burned. No, playing in the street is not okay because you are too little Traffic to see. This stuff about twisting all the nos into a yes. A do not run to we use walking feet or no yelling to let's use our inside voice is mostly ridiculous. No has it'...

 As you all know, I don't have children of my own, this was not a choice I made for me. My body has never been able - I am barren- those feelings are for another blog When I was 12 I took a "Red Cross Babysitting Course" & I began babysitting a severely disabled boy who lived next door. He was 14, but his abilities were that of a 3 or 4 year old. He taught me that each child learns differently and at their own pace. Seems I was always with kids. And I always loved them. I can't even tell you how many children came and went in my life so far but there's been a lot- I taught Sunday school, youth groups, family, friends kids... Then a TA, Teacher, Home VIsitor, Program Supervisor When I graduated high school, I began working with Migrant Head Start. The first season, I was a float so I got to work with all 3 age groups- infants toddlers and preschool. I loved it so much & the families got a kick out of me trying to learn Spanish so I could communicate with th...

 I was most recently diagnosed with a bad case of COVID, and PNUEMONIA and was in diastolic heart failure ALL @ once.  I was sent by ambulance to a hospital about 3& 1/2 hours away. The driver got lost& ended up on an unpaved road. It jiggled & twisted me up inside. I remember hurting and crying out Jesus please help us get there. Please help me. Please...   I don't know the rest but that it took us over 6 hours to arrive. Only to find I had to wait 36 hours in ER for a room my mom kept calling but I didn't have a location, I was in a corner makeshift room behind a curtain... I was an unknown. I don't have any recollection of those 2 days. I was moved to the COVID ward & have no recollection but I'm told I called my mom on one of those nights and said, Goodbye mama, I can't do this anymore. I love you. Goodbye & I hung up. I don't remember On the 5th day they asked me do you know your name? I did. Where are we? The hospital. Do you know your ...